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The crowd went bananas and threw eggs at the umpire. His uniform had enough yolks for three omelets.
At least he was good for something. The stupid umpire threw our best player out of the game.
Bumper Coates argued a called third strike that wasn’t even in the same time zone as home plate.
The crowd argued louder but we were armed. It was “Egg Day” at Ziggy Ziegenfuss Stadium
and Bumper Coates is the heart and soul of our beloved Pittswood Parrots.
Without Bumper in the game, the team became the Pitiful Parrots. Without our hero in the game,
all our hope for victory went from the lap of luxury to the dumpster of defeat.
The dumb umpire might as well have thrown the sun out of the sky.
What remained of the team gathered in a circle and the manager told them, “Be here or be square.”
But the circle had lost it’s center and the square had rounded corners.
The crowd calmed down when there were no more eggs to throw and Mr. Omelet yelled “Play ball!”
The game must go on.
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Footnote
THE...PITIFUL PITTSWOOD story is the copyrighted property of the LCSoL.
But Casey at the Bat is copyrighted by someone else.
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