West Coast Nephew/ East Coast Uncle

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"Hello, Nephew."

"Uncle Pete, how is life in Massapequa?"

"What life in Massapequa?"

"Oh, I forgot. You're almost 99 years old."

"You must be confusing my age
with that infernal California winter weather."

"Close:  80 degrees in Long Beach today."

"Ten degrees per inch."

"Ten degrees per inch. What do you mean?"

"Snow! We're supposed to have eight inches."

"Give my regards to your ratio."

"Give my regards to your sarcasm."

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